Wish AND Work (Reposted)

I was looking through a box of old documents and nostalgic items in an effort to eliminate some clutter from my life. I unearthed a colorful sheet of paper covered in red, white and blue marker, made to look like a flag along with some adolescent writing.

Like most boys my age I had played "war" with other kids and at home on my own. Those who shared in this activity will recall you'd generally use toy or imaginary guns to hold off or defeat an invisible enemy. Sometimes they were Nazis, or British Redcoats from the revolution, sometimes aliens from an unfriendly planet (for me, a Bostonian, this was the era between Star Wars and Raiders of the Lost Ark.) I'd make machine gun, or laser gun noises and toss sock hand grenades with great fanfare. Typically it was the family cat that bore the brunt of the assaults. I could always count on a solid victory right before dinner.

During one of my solitary battles I declared an early conquest and found myself with a little time before being called downstairs for pork chops and applesauce. I decided my triumph required the commission of a new flag and country motto. It was this sheet of paper that opened the floodgate of memories; however it was the scribbled motto that resonated with me all these years later. It read:

"Those who wish, dreams may come true.But those who wish and work will find their dreamsand riches too."

I thought that was pretty good insight for a twelve year old. Unfortunately, it applied perfectly, albeit painfully to a situation I was in at the time because of poor goal setting.

I had my eyes on a dream house in a dream neighborhood for years. I had driven past it, day and night and seen it in all seasons. I'd witnessed pumpkins and holiday lights, Easter eggs and Fourth of July banners. Each time I had passed by it, I was filled with longing. Oh, to raise my family in such a house. It was perfect, I thought and I would never have to move again, because it would accommodate all the milestones in my family’s life. I had wished myself inside it to the point of sleepless nights spent imagining what the floor plan looked like, how I'd furnish it. What type of music would fill its halls? I would wish, and wish and wish.

One day I drove by this dream house and to my surprise saw that it was for sale. What a terrific opportunity --if I had done more than just wish all these years. If I had wished and worked I'd have known the square footage, the age of the home, the property tax. I'd have gotten to know the neighbors. I might have been invited inside and determined if it truly was everything I had imagined. I would have spoken with a realtor and expressed my interest in it long ago. I would have networked. I would have paid other bills and watched my credit scores more closely. I would have saved and invested my money so that when the day had arrived… the day I had wished many years for, I could capitalize on it and then my dream would have come true. Alas, the wishing was vivid, but the work nonexistent. The rule applies to everything you want out of life and I knew it at twelve but had not practiced it.

"Those who wish, dreams may come true.But those who wish and work will find their dreams and riches too."

What are you dreaming about? How much work are you putting in to fulfill those dreams?

A New Look

Bim Musings changed it's look. Now there's an interactive way of dealing with leadership and management issues. Here's a place for those new to leadership, or those looking for leadership renewal to share there thoughts, ideas, best practices with others.

You can still read articles written by Karl Bimshas by subscribing to "Reflections on Leadership" in the sidebar.

Need Help? Be Specific.

When I was working at a Fortune 500 company, my division was internally merging with a culturally different organization. It was essentially the Gen X crowd versus The Baby Boomer generation. One side would list major accomplishments as their wedding day, the birth of a child, or a trip abroad they had saved up for. The other, President’s Club, numbers they hit, problems they solved. Two different worlds – united in the fact that we all very much disliked our new boss. This boss did do one thing very right. He saw that the intergration was not smooth so he hired outside help to bring us together.

We escaped to an island and embarked on a number of team building exercises. They were mostly awkward, but occasionally fun. At the end of each one we would debrief and discuss what we learned – what went right, what went wrong. Inevitably, each one ended with the realization that we needed clearer communication and to be more helpful toward each other. One of our last exercises changed the dynamic of the team, my place on it and forever altered how I approach communication, particularly when asking for help.

We were paired up into several teams, deposited into a large field and instructed to use the compass each team was provided to race around key areas of the meadow. An orienteering on steroids. This brought up the competitive spirit unlike any of the other exercises. The person I was teamed with was a very nice guy, but an over accomidating follower with no innate leadership that I could tell. As the race began I instantly forgot my cub scout training on how to actually adjust and read a compass. I asked for help, but my coworkers, some of them very good friends, began to mock me. They were off and racing, and each time they passed by they would taunt us, but never offering assistance. It began to tick me off and strengthen my resolve. We eventually got instruction from the facilitator and after a five minute delay, my partner and I were able to surge up to a second place finish.

During our after action review I was uncharacteristically livid. “What had happened to the many hours we had already spent learning the value of team, and communication, and helpfulness? Were those other exercises just a waste of time, had we learned nothing,” I quizzed angrily. Many were shocked by my red faced outburst, but they understood the point and my passion that it had aroused. One colleague explained by way of a future solution. “You just said, someone help – you weren’t specific. What help did you need and who did you want it from? I’m competitive, and was so busy I didn’t even hear you. It’s like the tons of email I get everyday. When someone copies in the world looking for help, I tend to ignore it. I figure someone else on the distribution list will help. The fact is, everyone is busy and no one ever helps, because they don’t know how.”

He continued, “Be specific in what you want and who you want it from.” Poignant words, which I found to be immediately true. In the heat of the moment, when I approached the facilitator, I addressed him by name and specifically asked him if he could give me a quick refresher on how to set and read the compass. He did, and as a result I got exactly what I wanted.

The team came together fairly quickly after that weekend away. There were too many other influences that prevented up from becoming a truly high performing team, but we communicated with each other exceptionally well, and we were always able to get the help we needed from each other, because instead of standing in a field shouting to the heavens, we asked specific people what specific help we needed. The results were faster and much more satisfying.

Directors Direct

When I was a student at Emerson College, one of my sophomore courses had me direct a short video production. The college, with its strong, “learn by doing” approach, had two studios with cameras freshly donated from the local television station. This particular class was taught by an exceptionally chic PBS producer who always clutched a coffee filled Styrofoam cup in her hand.

I had completed many video projects in high school and during my freshman year at Emerson. Having had already written the script and storyboard the prior week, when it was my day to direct I was feeling very comfortable and was assured I had everything under control. I remember feeling jazzed as I ran back and forth between the control room and the studio, where I set up particular shots and helped move pieces of the set. I rolled a ladder into position under a spotlight and began to scramble up it when my sophisticated instructor called out to me, “Karl, what are you doing?”

“Adjusting the light,” I replied.

“Don’t you have a lighting director? She quizzed

“Yes,” I said.

“Then tell them what to do,” she said.

“But –,” I started to explain.

She looked up at me and motioned with her hand, “Look around – see all these people just standing? That’s you’re crew.”

“But, I was just trying to help,” I offered

“Their job is to help you – your job is to direct them. If they aren’t helping you they know they will fail this assignment. In real life, if they didn’t help you, they would be fired and not get paid,” she said.

I started to protest about how I was brought up, but she would have none of it. In surprising less than polite PBS language she told me, “Now get your (butt) off that (freaking) ladder and into the control room. Do not come out on the studio floor again until the shoot is over and you congratulate or reprimand your crew. Right now you have a (freaking) show to do, so use your headset, use your floor manager and use your assistant director. You are the director – (freaking) direct!”

In short order the control room and studio were buzzing with activity and it ended up being a great experience.

At first blush this may run counter to how many believe teams work. It may seem to challenge a culture of empowerment, or the servant leadership lifestyle. It doesn’t. In fact, it fits perfectly well into those contexts. It took me years to not so much learn, but confirm that early leadership lesson. There are different styles of directors that may emphasis one nuance over another, but the basic formula is the same. Set the vision; communicate the vision, repeatedly, wisely assign roles and delegate tasks to those who can best fulfill the vision. Then get out of their way, so they can do their job in a way that compliments your job. Give them feedback, but don’t do the work for them. At the end of the production, learn from any mistakes and celebrate success. We needn’t complicate things. Directors Direct. Leaders Lead.

New Book Now Available

I am pleased to announce the publication of
Pushing Back the Ocean: Tide Turning Leadership Lessons

Pushing Back the Ocean: Tide Turning Leadership Lessons
By Karl Bimshas
ISBN: 978-1-4116-9703-4

The short journey begins along a wintry and desolate Cape Cod beach where you’ll discover how to push back the ocean by discovering the magic of goals. Next you’ll learn how to think like a champion and help others find their own passion. Finally, you’ll realize how easy – and necessary, it is to change a piece of the world.

A wonderful gift for anyone who needs to focus on their goals
or make the time to reflect on how far they’ve come.

Immediately available online at
www.lulu.com/KarlBimshas
$9.95

This book might be of interest to you and your friends. It demonstrates my drive to lead and inspire others to maximize their unique strengths and continuously improve themselves, their organization and society, by bringing the powers of vision, passion and action to each endeavor.

Give the Gift.
Help Turn the Tide!

Shortly Borders, Amazon, Barnes and Noble and other fine online booksellers will carry this title. You can also ask your local bookstore to order it for you. Of course I would be delighted by your purchase and online review, but today I am more interested in getting the word out. If you think others would also be interested please forward this message to them.

Learn more at
www.KarlBimshas.com

Who Do You Love?

I recently asked this question of the people I work with. Specifically, “Which clients do you love the most?” More interesting than the answers to that question was the speed in which everyone was able to respond. There was virtually no hesitation as grown men and women – some road weary and hardened by the world, were able to freely and easily proclaim their love of particular clients. I didn’t ask why they loved the clients they chose – but none could resist signing the virtues of those who had earned their affection. The reasons were as varied as, “They always pay on time” to “They get us and it’s always a pleasure to be with them.” When they spoke, they pitched forward on their toes, appeared lighter on their feet and a sparkle danced in their eyes. As they continued to speak of these exalted clients they almost seemed giddy – certainly confident and overwhelmingly pleased.

Now, to me, that looked a lot like love. Unfortunately my follow up question didn’t elicit as much frivolity.

“How much time do you spend with those you love?”

The swift wind that had filled their sails moments earlier had just been zapped, their magnificent sailboats stalled at sea as the air visibly deflated from their chests.

Excuses were mumbled over tightened lips – but it didn’t really matter what the reasons were, the result was the same. Neglect. Everyone one of them knew that love suffering from neglect could easily go away. It may be sudden or gradually – but it is inevitable.

Whether it be clients, employees, colleagues, family or friends – are you spending enough time with those you love? If not, start – because fundamentally there is nothing that you could possibly be spending time on that is more important or worthwhile than the people you love?

There are two ways to remedy this. First, shift your priorities to spend less time on the “burdens” and more time with those you love. Second, simply love more. Whether it be clients, employees, colleagues, family or friends – lead with a loving heart.

Four Steps to Improvement

Why make things more complicated than they have to be?

Here are four simple steps to take in order to make improvements in virtually anything you pursue.

1. Know your outcome
2. Take action
3. Notice if it’s working
4. If it’s not working try something else
   

Oversimplified?

Not really.

Stick to it and accomplish things.

Fight it and risk wallowing in mediocrity.

Valuing Liberty

Leader of the free world and Super Power are lofty self-proclaimed titles for a relatively young nation. The character of the American citizen is unusual. We are brash, aggressive, driven, inventive, curious and compassionate. But should we act as disciplinarian. The stern parent of a reckless world. Absolutely.

We are not a perfect people. No nation possesses perfection. Our form of government and its leaders, like our citizens are flawed. We are a forgiving people, blessed with great compassion. Our history has earned us the role we play on this increasingly smaller planet. Although we have foibles, our founders and our elected leaders, the men and women we have put into the decision and influence making positions, whether through the ballot or through public interest, have sustained, tweaked, fiddled and continued to improve a very basic principle that has served humanity well. All men are created equal. Liberty and freedom bring out the best of people’s minds and abilities. The consequence is that it can also bring out the worst, which is why such a high price is placed, justly on values.

Values are intimate to each human being. However all citizens of a community must share some unifying values, whether that community be a family, a corporation, a nation or the world. The people of the United States of America value life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Our constitution is our guide. Like the Bible and many other great works, the contents are open to interpretation. America also values the right to debate, to criticize and to disagree. Many of our citizens have lived with our freedom for so long that they forget, sadly, that much of the world does not have it in the dawning years of a new millennium.

Until the entire world can appreciate freedom and is united in defeating oppressors of that inalienable human right, someone must stand up for it consistently. Because we are the freest of nations we must defend all other nations and people pursuing liberation regardless of its tactical importance to our national security. For the biggest thereat to our national security is the loss of liberty. That is why the words of John F. Kennedy still ring true today and should serve as a reminder until the world achieves peace.

“Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend oppose any foe to assure the survival and the success of liberty.”

If we do not believe those words today we are not entitled to the freedom our predecessors fought so hardly for and we should be ashamed.

Four “Must Haves” to Earn a Successful Organization

There must be a strong leader AND pervasive leadership.

Charisma is not leadership, although it can act as a helpful tool to quickly gain the acceptance of an audience. Effective leaders share a passion for and a record of accomplishments. Strong leadership is demonstrated daily by a person or a group of people who are honest, forthright, markedly visible and approachable. They fulfill their need to be out in the field regularly. If not actually walking on the frontlines then they talk with people who work there, both in “town hall” meetings and in one to one settings. They remember that just as the shepherd is there for the benefit of the flock, leadership is there to serve the people.

The organization must have a repeatable compelling vision and sense of purpose.

If possible it should be a clear and concise singular vision. Every activity that the organization tackles must be able to foster a closer linkage to that compelling vision. It must be memorable and repeatable so that every message, action and strategy supports the purpose with their obvious connections. The clarity of the vision should be worded and marketed in a way that others can understand it, support it, be excited by it, be growing some passion around it, and be inventive in discovering other ways to achieve that purpose.

There must be a sense of overwhelming optimism.

The compelling vision is not only the day to day here’s what we need to do and why, but the over arching here is our place on earth, here’s our legacy, here’s the good that we wish to do. Living that is what creates a legacy. Knowing that is what helps create positivism. That positive approach has to be all encompassing. Tolerance of rampant apathy or negativism is a weakness. If optimism is not visible in practice, alarms should sound and priority given to overcoming whatever the obstruction may be. This does not forego the crucial role of devils advocate and challenging viewpoints -- but to leave negative feelings or remarks unchecked, even in the simplest day-to-day transactions, is to enable the contagion. Counter the virus with positive encouragement and recognition.

There must be a regular diet of meaningful recognition.

Positive reinforcement, thanks and praise are the nutritional components of a healthy workforce, the helium that lifts the balloon to new heights. It is a currency that many organizations are afraid of spending; yet its value can be limitless. Without it or withholding it until the perfect moment can result in at worst, a bankruptcy of human potential, and at best, leave people with a feeling of emotional deficiency. All people want to do a good job, regardless of which motivations they declare to be driven by; the rewards of learning new experiences, enhancing important relationships or legacy building, people will respond to those who notice what they have already contributed with even greater performance.

Discovering Your Passion for Excellence

Exceptional human achievement fascinates me. Helen Keller, Carl Lewis, Christopher Reeve, Abraham Lincoln, Albert Einstein, the band of Patriots that helped found this great nation, you and me -- all filled with potential. The people mentioned above are recognizable to most, but there are billions of others just like them on this planet, and they all have something in common ... a passion.

We all have a passion for something, whether it is for golf or little league, cooking or writing, acting or reading. Wine connoisseurs and bottle cap collectors abound.

What’s your passion?

Can you see it? Most of you can.

What do you want to do with it? What do you envision? What do you want to accomplish?

Those are harder questions for many. Maybe you’ve got the answers. Now...what are you actually doing? Is there determination in your eyes -- has your pulse quickened?

They say we can’t solve world hunger.
The truth is we can.

They say good things happen to those who wait.
The truth is, the better rewards go to those who make things happen.

They said walking on the moon was a crazy idea.
They were right -- but we did it anyway.

They say, “can’t”,
we say, “can”.

They ask “why?”
we ask, “why not?”

They say, “if only…”
we ask, “what if...?”

They are challenged.
We challenge.

They are the passengers,
and we are the drivers.

Are you are too tired?
Work too hard?
Feel the world has been unfair?
Do you frequently ask, “why me?” with a bovine expression painted across your face?

Sadly, you are not alone. But if you know what you want -- then dream about it -- talk about it, and do it.

Look around. Working alongside of you is one of the most talented people in the entire world. They bring something that no one else does.

Do you know what it is? Find out. Learn from them. Share ideas and dreams, and once you discover what it is, what that special gift they bring to us is -- tell them. Let them know you see it. Because the truth is most of them aren’t even aware of what they have.

Organizations grow, but do they mature?
Are we enlightened enough to know what’s going on -- to understand where we are headed?
To not only find, but also to use the tools needed to build our future?

Some people are already there. They’ve got their sleeves rolled up and they’re lending a hand. These are the people who don’t watch the clock, but they do set the pace.

What about you?
Can you be counted on?
Do your actions match your words?
Are you positive and proactive and professional in everything you say and do?
Do you create problems or do you create solutions?

Ask that person working alongside of you; they’ll tell you.
But what if they tell you something you don’t want to hear?
What if they tell you the truth?
Thank them -- wholeheartedly. Then roll up your sleeves and get to work. Learn more. Take classes; attend workshops. Find a mentor -- be a mentor. Share.

Some of you think -- but I’m too busy or there’s not enough time. Friends, time is the great equalizer. It’s one of the few manmade instruments that are equally distributed in nice, easy to swallow increments.
You can take 24 hours,
or you can take 1,440 minutes,
or 86,400 seconds.
The portion is up to you.

The world provides so many resources and tools to each of us. Naysayers, smirk or gawk if you must. But while you smirk and gawk and make protestations -- the person next to you is learning and growing. They are developing themselves and helping others along the way; and before you know it, they will no longer be sitting beside you, because these types of people don’t sit in one place for long. They know that increased learning leads to increased earning. Not just financial rewards; they earn accolades and respect and satisfaction.

So, do you want to sit or stand? Walk or run? The decision is yours. Reach in, deep inside, and find out what motivates you. Set your goals. What the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve. And achieve we must. If you’re tired -- rest. But don’t stay out of the action for too long, because as you rest, others work, and practice, and perfect their dreams. Don’t be left behind.

Be leaders.
Be learners.
Be coaches.
Be students.
Be mentors.
Be mentioned.
Be proud and finally,
be passionate.

How Strong is your Influence?

My wife and I were driving to one of the many birthday parties that have become a part of our weekend life since kids. We began talking about how we struggle a little with the influences various people have on our children.

We have a diverse array of friends, coworkers, neighbors, schoolmates and loved ones we regularly interact with. Naturally, there is also a diverse array of beliefs and values that these people hold, and as most parents will agree, some of what we run into runs counter to what we are trying to teach at home. Although we do not always approve of these exposures, we wouldn't trade them for a narrower view of the world, even though narrower is easier.

My daughter, thankfully, is at the point where she relishes telling us what things she has learned on her adventures away from us, be it at sleepovers, school trips or time with family or a sitter. We cringe whenever she repeats some limiting belief or ignorant outlook on the world others have painted as fact. It may have been delivered to her via course language or less than progressive ideas, or even though questionable actions that go ignored.

It takes effort for us to give her an alternative view and explain how, even though our family is tolerant and accepting of other points of view, we have chosen to live life a particular way and some things we do not accept at home. This could be as straightforward as a violent cartoon show, or more complex like an ignorant slur, or activities such as smoking.
It occurred to my wife and I that we could shelter and limit what we deemed “harmful” exposures, but that would be a disservice. Doing so would only result in sheltered children, who would grow up ill prepared for the challenges of the world. Instead, we agreed, we must equip them with tools to overcome the obstacles they face. Obstacles will always appear; the world is full of challenges. The only requirement is to be stronger than the problem before you. To do that as parents, we need to ensure our influence is stronger than that which our children are exposed. The same is true in all leadership.

Provide the tools, the inspiration and ultimately the trust. You will need to make corrections when those you serve go astray, but more often than not just a slight redirection to the mission or vision is all that’s required. Doing this a little bit, but constantly should help prevent the need for a major, more painful and possibly less successful correction in the future.
Never doubt the influence one human being has on another. For good or bad, help or hindrance, limiting or limitless we are interconnected. Know that in everything you do, you are an influence and act accordingly.

Happy New Year!

The week between Christmas and New Year's Day has evolved into one of my favorite. It is fun to witness how people prepare and react to the changing of the calendar.

There are those who are racing around, try to complete the goals they set many months ago before the turn of the clock. There is usually energy, enthusiasm and excitement about them as they move, ever closer to completion. There are also those, so fully satisfied in the year that they are able to relax with family and friends in the reflective merriment of past achievement and discuss, with wild anticipation, what is to come.

Then there are those who dip a little into both camps. They have begun to remember how far they have traveled in the last twelve months. There is pride in the realization that there has been growth, a sense of better living. Yet, there is a nagging sensation of some work left undone, some challenge unmet. If unchecked, this lack of contentment can creep into the warmth of familial celebration and chill the dawning of a new year. Deferred objectives often become resolutions. Resolutions often have a short life, the vast majority melting away by early spring. These people can take solace in the fact that we do not need the calendar to spur us into action. We have the ability to focus on achieving important goals anytime we wish.

Still, there is a vibe that fills the air this time of year, when it seems everyone is focused on self-improvement and well wishes toward each other. Embrace this global commemoration with the knowledge that there is much good that each of us has done. The experiences of the past year make each of us stronger and better able to meet new challenges, whether they are self imposed or thrust before us. Replace anxiety with anticipation, complexity with simplicity, and confusion with clarity by setting a few goals that help propel you closer to the person you endeavor to become. The world has given you permission to clean the slate and begin anew. Take advantage of it and have a very Happy New Year.

A Christmas Message

It seems an appropriate day to make note of the large number of books that cite the leadership style of Jesus.

Titles like:

Jesus on Leadership, The Leadership Wisdom of Jesus: Practical Lessons for Today, Jesus CEO: Using Ancient Wisdom for Visionary Leadership, The Management Methods Of Jesus Ancient Wisdom For Modern Business, Jesus, Life Coach: Learn from the Best, Lead Like Jesus: Lessons from the Greatest Leadership Role Model of All Time

and others.

Regardless of your belief system, the influence of Jesus cannot be denied. Is what you’re currently working on going to be worthy of quoting over 2000 years from now? As Ken Blanchard has said, “He is simply the greatest leadership role model of all time."

Leadership consultants, pundits and hacks alike can cite all the innovative leadership practices, but I suspect all the new methods have been used before with great affect and greater effectiveness.

As we enter the yearend stretch and begin to reflect, plan and resolve, it may bode everyone well to pick up any of the above books, or The Book and just read a chapter or two. The result undoubtedly would lead us just a tiny bit close to peace on earth and good will toward all man.

Merry Christmas!

The Power Question

Do you want to make a positive difference in the world? There’s one question that combines servant leadership mentality with a focus on results. I call it “The Power Question” because it carries a lot of clout. It contains the results driven muscle of helpfulness, compassion, and empowerment in learning what is truly important to others. Here it is.

“What one thing can I do for you that will most help you make a positive difference?”

If you come across someone who is unfocused or troubled, lost in a tizzy of disorder or stalled with ineffective confusion, ask him or her The Power Question. It requires them to slow down and assess how you and your abilities could best help them. You are forcing them to delegate a task to you that must be positive in nature, or at the very least lead to a positive outcome. Once determined, honor the request -- after all you asked for it. Accomplishing that mission will make you feel like a million bucks and will no doubt be of great service to the recipient.

You may need to help some along. Start brainstorming together and eventually you’ll both be able to come across a very good idea that will help the other person positively move forward. Those deep in disarray could give you an ill-conceived knee-jerk response. Just coax them gently with the clarification, “Will that best help you make a positive difference?” They will ultimately respond with what they think you can do for them and they’ll appreciate the attention you’re giving them.

If you ever find yourself stuck and unsure of what to do next, go to someone, anyone and ask The Power Question.

“What one thing can I do for you that will most help you make a positive difference?”

You will always get a well-intentioned answer. Being able to help someone when you are having difficulties is one of the best medicines available. Quite often the very act of helping another has the pleasant side effect of resolving your own troubles simultaneously. You frequently find your problem to be insignificant when matched against that of another. In some instances, time spent away from your own problem gives your mind a chance to work on it without your continual interruption. Sometimes the lessons you learn while helping someone else can be applied to your own problem. Honestly answering The Power Questions will create a positive and proactive feeling in yourself, the likes of which you probably have not experienced in quite a long time.

So go ahead and ask The Power Question. Try to get in the habit of asking it of someone different everyday. You’ll be enhancing relationships and in no time building a reputation as a helpful problem solver. What could be better?

Snakebite and Venom

Two friends are walking along a path when they happen across a rattlesnake. One of the men, pompous and careless, severs the snake with an ax, but not before it bites the foolish man on the wrist. The man wails and flails his arm all about in pain while his companion is immobilized with panic. There is a third man, an experienced hiker several hundred feet away who has witnessed the events. Which one is you and what do you do next?

Perhaps you are the foolish man, filled with bravado who acts violently in the face of latent danger and who is paying the painful price of his folly.

Maybe you are the other man, made powerless with indecision and panic, whirling about uselessly.

Or perhaps you are the experienced hiker, equipped with the knowledge that, although painful, snakebites don’t kill people, it’s their venom. Venom that if not removed, courses through the veins, accelerated by the constant movement and shaking of an ignorant and fearful victim.

This scene is repeated in people’s lives nearly everyday. We’ve all experienced painful situations. We may have antagonized someone who then lashes out at us, or we may have come across trouble unexpectedly and been the victim of a painful blow. Our first inclination is to lash back, to bellow accusations of unfairness and to blame our trespassers. If only we recognized that energy would have been better spent by removing the venom and repairing the damage. How often are we the experienced hiker, witnessing these events yet instead choosing to keep walking rather than help those who are angry, confused or hurting? Even though we have the skills or knowledge that could solve the problem, bring about calmness, alleviate pain, or perhaps even save a life, we decide not to get involved.

Therein sits one of the differences between a leader and a follower. Leaders get involved. They act. They do not shrug their shoulder and sigh, “Oh, well.” They give of themselves, protect people and remove the venom from the veins of others, and teach others to do the same.

When trouble looms before you, what role will you play?

The Modern Haberdasher

I am a rare breed of man who is as comfortable in suits as others are in a well-worn pair of jeans. As a result, I tend to burn through them quicker than most. An unfortunate realization, I generally buy them from stores that have “depot”, “wearhouse”, or “factory” in their names. One day I may evolve to purchasing suits from the array of stores that end in apostrophe “s”, but for now, I’m still a bit of a skinflint.

My wife went to one of our neighborhood haberdashers and had four suits held aside for me to peruse later. That evening, the two of us returned to the store where I was greeted by one of the clerks who asked if I needed any help. Out of habit I immediately dismissed him. My wife stepped forward to tell him we had several suits on hold. He fetched them and we met near the dressing rooms. I tried on each of the suits, subjecting myself to the three-way mirror while my wife editorialized about cut and color. We whittled the selection down to two. Throughout this the sales person hung back quietly. I voiced some concern over the particular cut of one of the jackets when he finally chimed in with some nonsense about it being very popular now because all the newscasters are wearing them. The extent of his influence on my buying decision was infinitesimal.

As the cashier rung up the final choices I noticed three of the sales staff coagulating near one of the bargain racks, eerily reminiscent of a used car lot. From across the store another sales associates, probably a supervisor, called out, “No clumping. Remember the meeting. Circulate. Circulate.” They quickly scattered with laughter. The gentleman who had “helped” me earlier walked passed the supervisor with a smile and remarked, “Of all the places I’ve worked over the years, this is the only place I’ve been that the sales people actually work.” Pathetic. What sales “work” actually occurred? It was nothing more than demand fulfillment. Now, I may be guilty of turning suits into a commodity. My buying criteria tend to be price and overall look and feel. Still, how successful was the sale? I had four suits in my hand but only left with two. How could this have been a more effective experience for the store?

At another establishment, where price is commensurate with value, they also value team. The sales person measures me, asks what I’m looking for, gushes over how wonderful I look and what a smart choice I’ve made. He then introduces me to a charming sales associate who suggests a new shirt that can make the interwoven threads of the suit “pop”. She’s right, of course. And what’s the point of a new shirt without a new tie? She offers two, taking the guesswork out of it. Can’t decide? Buy them both and bring one back later. (Like that would ever happen.) What about cuff links, or brass stays to keep those bothersome collars from winging up? In this establishment I am cared for as an intelligent and powerful man, capable of making scores of decisions. Repeatedly validated through the sale. Do I value that? Yes, who wouldn’t? Yet the money I spend on that value-added white glove treatment never fails to make me feel a little worked. Is it all worth the price of an additional suit? Not to me. This is still old school, because value-add is generally for the benefit of the seller. There’s not much sales work to be done. It’s like an ineffective real estate agent taking a grown man and woman through a house and proudly beaming, “and this is the kitchen.” No kidding, a five-year-old child could figure that out.

Business development is about demand creation. How could a suit sales person be an effective business developer? They would canvas a particular geography, or demographic. Study what is being worn. Know the industry well enough to accurately tell someone his or her size and complementary color scheme. Know the customers preference of form or function. Then address the target market with custom tailoring. Perhaps offering cuffing and minor repairs on-site or within an hour. They would know if prospective customers needed suits or casual sports coats. They would know when their clients needed to look especially sharp and respond accordingly.

The sales profession is often maligned. Unfortunately, as is the case with the practice of law, faulty practitioners create the perception. Mediocrity disguised as effort. The professional who makes the time to know their client, to truly care about their well being and success, who feels the compulsion to serve, rather than an attitude that they deserve, will far exceed the results of those who still think shepherding customers to their already researched and decide conclusion is hard work.

Seven Simple Truths

I recently uncovered some notes I took on a cross-country flight eight years ago. Reviewing them after such an absence adds credence to my belief that they were not just the scribbling of a jetlagged pundit, jotting down the latest vogue notions. As I recall, my journal became the captive audience where I was able to assemble a collection of “ah ha’s” that had finally resonated with me. When I consider the numerous life events that have occurred, personally and globally in that period of time, it provides me with reassuring solace that these Seven Simple Truths are straightforward, spot on and should be reviewed with greater frequency than I have done.

Seven Simple Truths

One, it is better to be good. I don’t mean pious, but I do mean knowing ethical behavior and common sense manners. Knowing you’re values and acting in accordance to them.

Two, cause and effect works in every event whether we choose to believe it or not. Everything happens for a reason and the reason is a reaction to what has already occurred.

Three, we all need to give more. We need to give more of our time, our energy our thoughts, our ideas, our talents, ourselves -- more of everything imaginable. We must give; this includes our love as well. We should remember that gifts of any sort are tokens of affection or appreciation. Indeed, appreciation begets affection. Therefore if we do not feel genuine appreciation or affection that will be reflected in the gift.

Four, anything is possible. Everything that exists today that was created by man was once a foolish idea that people thought would never work. The truth of the matter is everything is possible. Every problem is solvable. Every epidemic is curable and every thirst quenchable. We have the power and the ability to abolish poverty, to end starvation, to resolve conflict without bloodshed. With patience, perseverance and focused thinking we can accomplish any goal. It may not be easy, but it can be done.

Five, the body and mind must be exercised. The body must guard our mind and our mind must inspire our body. While in this form they rely on each other. Once they begin to separate our time left in this form hastens to become less important.

Six, being happy is better than being sad. However, both are emotions, and emotions are not right or wrong. They just are. They are the by-products of an action. Therefore it is better to do things that make you positive and upbeat. Always smile, laugh and inquire like a child. We are given so much – it is the ignorant that attempt to take it away with slack faces, sour attitude and doomsayer clichés.

Seven, know what you want. It is simply that easy. Just knowing what it is you want to accomplish sends you well on your way ahead of the indecisive pack.

Think more. Do more. Give more. See more. Be more. Laugh more. And know that anything is possible.

Pushing Back the Ocean

Once, on a late December morning, I decided to stroll along Nauset Beach, one of the most breathtaking to be found on Cape Cod. The late year wind was cold, but refreshing. As I walked along the shoreline I occasionally glanced over my shoulder to spy my solitary footprints in the sand. I was conscious of the fact that at the time I wasn’t sure if the tide was coming in or going out. I was walking without purpose at first, just trying to clear the fog in my head.

I had noticed that there was an object away in the distance ahead of me, and I recall closing my coat tighter around my neck and thinking to myself, “Well, I’m not going to walk that far.” I then thought of the footprints behind me and imagined the waves washing them away. That made me consider, like many have before when leaving footprints, how temporary our time is, and how we should relish each step in our journey.

Soon that object in the distance appeared much closer and I thought, “Yeah, let’s go for it.” I picked up my pace, then, almost immediately found myself sprinting toward it. It turns out it was only a large piece of uneventful driftwood, but as I circled it I stumbled across my earlier single set of footprints now trailing toward me. Looking down the long stretch of beach I could tell that at first they meandered gently, then straightened and dug deeper into the sand at the point I decide to investigate the washed up wood. It was I then realized that the tide was indeed going out and my steps would be preserved a few hours more. I decided to use them as a path to return to the parking lot where my outing had begun. It didn’t take long before I noticed that I wasn’t matching my footprints step for step. At first I weaved back and forth over my original route, but ultimately my new steps were coursing closer to the water’s edge. Yes, the tide was receding, but the tracks I left made it appear as if I were pushing the ocean back. This was a very interesting experience for me, analogous to the pursuit of goals and life itself.

The mark we leave on the earth is indeed temporary, but it may be longer lasting then we think. It is fine to meander through the day without purpose if you like, but when you pick a goal that you can see, you can’t help but race for it. Once you reach your destination, make the time to reflect, to see how far you’ve come. Although you may want to retrace your steps, you won’t be able to match them exactly because the conditions have changed, as new goals present themselves. And you will find yourself, if only fleetingly, pushing back the ocean. What a beautiful experience and with contemplation, a wonderful gift from God!

On Sincerity

Practice what you preach. Act with integrity. These phrases are thrown about frequently along with words like genuine, credible, authentic, sincere.

In the days of the Roman Empire potters and sculptors would fill cracks or imperfections in their work with wax, then glaze it over before selling them at market. When I first heard this, I imagined these beautiful pieces eventually weeping during the heat of the day, the wax melting under the sun, God’s spotlight. When a piece of work was flawless, or the craftsman one of high integrity, a seal was placed on it that read, “sine cere”, a Latin term meaning, “without wax.” These were obviously the most desirable pieces and held up under the toughest of scrutiny.

How often do people today live with sincerity, without wax? It’s easy to impugn public officials; sadly many have not performed well under the spotlight. However, looking inward, I recognize I too have been lax.

In an effort to improve efficiency with my team at work, I have insisted on certain process steps be followed. Yet as I reflect, in expediency, I myself have failed to follow those steps. At home, I have lamented the children to sit up straight, only to later find myself slouching on the couch, mouth agape, staring into the television. How often have others told their kids to clean their rooms only to find stacks of papers, post-its and books strewn about their own office? And how many have shouted, “Stop yelling, it’s not polite.”

Do as I say, not as I do. That’s practicing hypocrisy, not integrity. Others could easily reply, “I can’t hear what you’re saying, your actions speak so loudly.”

Some seem to live by what Jack Canfield calls the 18/40/60 Rule. At eighteen, you think everyone is looking at you. At forty, you don’t care who is looking at you. At sixty, you realize, no one was looking at you. There may be truth to that, but if you are a leader, people are looking at you. They are looking at your imperfections, your weaknesses and your ability to handle obstacles.

I believe if you know your mission and your core values and if you live on purpose and if, as Ken Blanchard says, “you are committed to your commitments”, then you are acting with authenticity. There may be flaws or cracks -- resist the urge to fill them with wax. Instead, think like Michelangelo, rather than hiding any blemishes, keep them exposed and work them into the final piece of art, your life and you will have lived with integrity.

Why Subtract, When you can Add?

Long ago, while I was struggling through an early math class, the whole concept of subtraction was frustrating and difficult for me; my mother gave me some guidance. “It use to give me trouble too when I was your age,” she told me. “I hate subtraction, so I don’t ever do it.”

This notion intrigued my young mind. Maybe Mom was going to get me out of math class. Could it be that easy? It wasn’t. “I figured out I just needed to add everything,” she confessed.

I felt duped. Not only wasn’t she getting me out of math class, she was making me do more math. She easily read the concerned and disappointed look on my face. “For example,” she continued, “instead of 7 take away 2, I think, what plus 2 equals 7?”

It was a great little tip, the wisdom of which I have not fully realized until these last few days. First off, what a terrific revelation of my Mother’s character and outlook on life. As a child she realized that she didn’t like subtraction. Instead of bemoaning that fact she searched for what could be added. To this day she explores the power of addition. She may be more tentative as she has aged, she grumbled about the Internet for months, but once we signed her on she mastered it in a couple of days. The innate positive-ness of her philosophy inspires me and it epitomizes the art of possibility. Rather than deleting things from your life, because they are burdensome, or too hard to figure out, consider exploring what you can add to it.

I began to think of this in terms of goal setting. For instance, in subtraction,

7 – 2 = ?

you do not know what your goal is, other than to make the outcome smaller. Yet if you flip the same problem around and look at it with a shifted paradigm that forces you to add, look what we discover.

2 + ? = 7

You now have a clear goal, 7, and a clear starting point, or existing condition, 2.

Just bridge the gap by adding to the existing condition and reaching your destination is assured.

Said another way...

2 (is the starting point, or existing condition) + (is an Attitude of Addition) ? (is the Gap between existing condition and goal) = 7 (the Goal, or destination)

What a beautiful way to view problems in the world! Thanks Mom.